Jade Empire does The Jerry Springer Show
by Richie S
Summary: Hilarity involving dual romance love triangle with guest appearances by Sky and Whirlwind.


-Cue Springer theme and entrance-

"Hi I'm Jerry Springer and welcome to our show, today's guests are here to listen to some shocking secrets from their loved ones. Our first guest is Furious Ming and he is here to tell his fiancé Dawn Star that he has been cheating on her. Ming what is your story?"

-camera pans to Furious Ming-

"Well Jerry, first of all I love your show and watch it every day, and I'm here to tell the love of my life that I have been cheating on her. She is never around when I need her and is cold to me a lot, she just doesn't understand what a man needs. I ended up talking about my problems with Dawn Star to her cousin Silk Fox and one thing led to another and we ended up sleeping together. So I am her to tell Dawn Star that while I love her she just is not doing enough to keep me with her and she needs to shape up or I'll leave her for her cousin."

-camera pans back to Jerry-

"Well Ming, Dawn Star has been back watching on the monitor and were going to bring her out. Ladies and gentleman here is Dawn Star."

-crowd applauds as Dawn Star charges out and slaps Ming in the face and begins screaming the following-

"You censored! We have known each other since we were kids, I love you, would have done everything for you and now you throw it away for my censored hussy of a cousin! censored you!

-Dawn Star continues in her diatribe as Jerry announces the entrance of Silk Fox, who immediately charges Dawn Star and begins brawling with her while shouting-

"You censored Dawn Star! Ming is a man and he has needs and you're too much of a lazy censored to take care of him so he came to me. Well you censored he is mine now, he loves me and now he's mine! censored you, he's mine!

-Security breaks up the fight and separates the two and gets them to chairs and ready for the discussion part of the show, Jerry begins speaking-

"Well emotions are running high, but Dawn Star don't you think you are over reacting? I mean you came to this show and you also have a secret for Ming, would you tell him this secret now? -Dawn Star turns to Ming and says- "Ming I love you , but you just were not satisfying me, so I ended up sleeping with a friend of yours. He could give me things that you never could."

-Ming's jaw drops as Jerry announces the entrance of the fourth person, Sky enters and Ming immediately rushes over and begins fighting with him while shouting-

"Sky you're a censored piece of miserable censored! I love Dawn Star and here you are, you're supposed to be my friend and then you go sleep with my fiancé! censored you!

-Security separates the two and gives Sky the chance to talk-

"Ming you are such a hypocrite! Not only did you cheat on Dawn Star with her cousin but their was that time we were at the tavern and we both got a little drunk and we started talking about men and women and we were both a little curious and we ended up," -Sky never finishes his sentence as Ming flies out his seat in a rage- "NO! We agreed to never talk about that night! It only happened one time, being with another guy just once doesn't mean your gay!" -This admission is met by looks of shocked bewilderment by Silk Fox and Dawn Star who manages to say- "That explains so much of why you never could" -she is cut off by Ming's tirade- "No! It was just that one time! It meant nothing to me or to anyone else!

-Ming is interrupted by Jerry-

"Well Ming that is not exactly true, we have backstage someone else besides Sky to whom the events of "that one time" mean a great deal to. -The Black Whirlwind enters. Now any goings on with the Whirlwind are much to intense to be handled on national television, even the Jerry Springer Show so let's just say by the end of the segment Ming and Sky have their faces buried in their palms, mortified by what was said while Dawn Star and Silk Fox both have looks of surprised excitement on their faces. Now it is time for end of the show, Jerry's Final Thought.-

"To my guests I liked to say thank you for appearing on the show and I hope you are able to find some degree of happiness. You know sometimes when you find a person that professes that they are in love with two different people are in love with neither. For if they were truly in love they would care enough so they would want to see both persons happy even if that happiness meant giving one of their lovers up so they could find someone else and they can dedicate themselves fully to their other lover. For if they truly were in love with someone they would have dedicated themselves fully to that person, no matter what the cost so when someone is in a dual romance they do not truly love anyone involved, they actually are in love with the thrill of being competed over and once the thrill of the chase is over it will not be long before that person is looking for someone else to pit in competition against whoever won the last contest. Until next time take care of yourself and each other.


End file.
